How we become emotionally independent

Growing up, there were countless times when I had an issue and the first thing I did was talk to someone. As I grew, I learned to turn that conversation inward, become self supportive. Of course, with big decisions, I may need to consult and get support. No harm in that. But constantly leaning on another made me feel less in charge of my life.

In therapy, a person ideally has a safe space to confide with the goal of lessoning the dependence on another for processing feelings. There are many steps, but firstly, only with awareness of the goal, and wanting the goal, is it possible.

From where I stand now, the above was written what seems to be ages ago. Although emotional independence is still empowering to me, it is not a complete independence, but just another side of the persona's coin. Since then, I have realized much about coregulation (letting others help us center ourselves) and the compassion we need especially from our loved ones, to feel that we are worthy and competent.